Healing For Love
Healing for Love is a podcast designed for those seeking to heal their schemas, shift unhelpful patterns, and grow into a more grounded, authentic self in love and life. Hosted by Dr. Gemma Gladstone, a dating and relationship coach and former clinical psychologist with over 25 years of experience, the show offers thoughtful, insight-rich episodes to help you understand your patterns and heal from past emotional wounds. Topics include common struggles like seeking approval, fearing abandonment, dating narcissists, and losing yourself in relationships. The podcast provides a space for self-reflection, emotional insight, and practical encouragement, helping listeners reconnect with their worth and build relationships that align with their true selves. It is aimed at women who are ready to feel more secure, whole, and themselves in love and in life.
Episodes
147. He Promises a Future, But Gives You Crumbs
Send Gemma a messageWARNING: This episode contains natural bird songs, twigs breaking & leaves crushing underfoot, the occasional breathlessnes and the distant sound of kids playing in a park 😊 Love Wisely is starting again soon! If you have been waiting for your chance to join me for the next 3-month journey to rewrite you Love Template, sign up below!. What does it really mean for someone to
146. 9 Signs You're Building a Healthy Relationship (What Healthy Love Actually Feels Like)
Send Gemma a messageMany women tell me they know what an unhealthy relationship feels like but they're much less certain about what a healthy one should feel like.In this episode, I walk you through nine signs that you're building a healthy, emotionally available relationship during the early stages of dating.Rather than focusing on red flags, we explore the aspects that signal emotional
145. 5 Signs You're Stuck in a Situationship That's Going Nowhere
Send Gemma a messageSituationships aren't new, but today they have a name.They're often marked by uncertainty, mixed messages, hope, and one person wanting much more than the other.In this episode, I explore five common signs that you're caught in a situationship that's unlikely to become the relationship you're hoping for.More importantly, we look at the psychology behind
144. Do You Have an Abandonment Wound? Signs It's Affecting Your Relationships
Send Gemma a messageHave you ever wondered why relationships can feel so emotionally intense?Why you find it difficult to leave someone, even when you know they're not right for you?Or why emotionally unavailable partners seem to become a recurring pattern?In this episode, I explore one of the most important psychological patterns I see in my work with women - the abandonment schema (or aband
143.The Dating Advice I Give Every Woman Looking for an Emotionally Available Partner
Send Gemma a messageIf you're serious about finding an emotionally available partner, there are some important shifts that can dramatically improve your chances of creating a healthy relationship.In this episode, I break down the practical dating advice I most often share with my coaching clients. Women who are tired of repeating painful relationship patterns and want to approach dating with
142. Why Dating Feels So Confusing: The Three Voices That Show Up On Every Date
Send Gemma a messageHave you ever left a date feeling completely conflicted? Part of you feels excited.Part of you feels anxious. Part of you wants to see them again.And part of you feels relieved it's over.In this episode, I explore why dating can feel so confusing and how different parts of ourselves can interpret the exact same situation in very different ways.Drawing on concepts from Sc
141. The Early Signs of Control in Relationships - Red Flags You Should Never Ignore
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode of Healing for Love, Dr. Gemma Gladstone explores the early warning signs of controlling, narcissistic and potentially coercive relationship dynamics - particularly the subtle behaviours that many women dismiss, minimise or explain away in the beginning.This episode is not about blame. It is about prevention, awareness and learning to trust yourself earlier.Gemm
140. People Pleasing in Relationships - The Psychology Behind Why You Put Others First
Send Gemma a messageEXCITING NEWS - Love Wisely Foundations is here! Enroll now for this one of a kind program and receive early access benefitsWhy do some people constantly put others first, struggle to say no, worry excessively about upsetting people, or feel guilty for prioritising themselves?In this episode of Healing for Love, Dr. Gemma Gladstone explores the deeper psychology behind people p
139. Dating Apps: Why They Feel So Hard and How to Navigate Them
Send Gemma a messageDating apps can feel like a bit of a horror show at times.But underneath the frustration, the confusion and the endless swiping… there’s something much deeper going on.In this episode, I explore how your schemas - particularly abandonment, defectiveness, emotional deprivation and people-pleasing patterns - can shape: Who you feel drawn to What you tolerate And why you might i
138. The Love Paradox: Why You Keep Choosing the Wrong Partner - And How to Break the Cycle
Send Gemma a messageThis episode is a special one - I’m sharing the audio from a recent live masterclass where I walk you through the deeper psychological patterns that drive attraction, and why insight alone often isn’t enough to change them.If you’ve ever found yourself drawn to emotionally unavailable, avoidant, or self-absorbed partners - even when you know better - this episode will help you
137. 10 Healthy Dating Rules for Women Who Tend to Over-Give
Send Gemma a messageIf dating tends to bring up anxiety, self-doubt, people-pleasing, or the urge to lose yourself in someone else, this episode is for you.In this practical episode, I’m speaking directly to women who tend to be very giving, very empathic, and very accommodating in relationships, but who often struggle to stay connected to themselves while dating.If you have a history of subjugati
136. What If Your Partner Struggles With Emotional Intimacy? - Listener Q&A
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode of Healing for Love, I respond to a thoughtful question from a listener who describes a relationship that is supportive and stable - yet something important is missing.Her partner is kind, affectionate, and easy to live with. But when it comes to emotional conversations, he rarely initiates them. Over time, she has begun to feel emotionally alone in the relation
135. How Can I Heal from Relationship Regret?
Send Gemma a messageHey, if you'd like to reduce your chances of future relationship regret, then come to my free live training: Join hereHave you ever looked back on a past relationship and thought:Why did I stay so long? Why didn’t I see the signs earlier? If only I had done something differently…Relationship regret can be incredibly painful. Many people find themselves stuck replaying the
134. My Top 5 Dark Red Flags in Dating (Part 2)
Send Gemma a messageIn Part 2 of this series, I continue unpacking the darker red flags that often show up early in dating – the ones that are easy to dismiss but costly to ignore.These are not minor quirks. They are patterns that predict future control, manipulation, blame-shifting, entitlement and emotional instability.In this episode, I explore:What I call “future mirroring” – a subtle form of
133. My Top 5 Dark Red Flags In Dating (Part 1)
Send Gemma a messageNot all red flags are equal.Some signal incompatibility.Others signal something much darker.In this episode, I’m breaking down the first three of my Top Five Dark Red Flags in Early Dating - the traits that, in my clinical experience, rarely improve with time and often predict controlling or deeply problematic relationship dynamics.If you’ve ever found yourself:Ignoring your gu
BONUS - Healing your Inner Child Meditation
Send Gemma a messageHere's a nurturing gift for youLet me know if you'd like more meditations like this 🩷🩷Support the show🩷 Join Love Wisely (Group) PRIORITY List - we start September!🎓 NEW - Love Wisely Foundations Course - Get Instant Access!✅Dating App Profile CHECK-UP🎁 Dating With Insight - FREE Guide💛 Elevate You Worth (50% off only for listeners) - Use coupon WORTHY Connect with Me
132. Emotional Needs in Relationships: Why You Feel Unfulfilled in Love
Send Gemma a messageMany women struggle in relationships without ever being taught one essential truth: you are allowed to have emotional needs.In this episode of Healing for Love, Gemma explores the concept of core emotional needs through a schema therapy lens and explains why unmet needs sit at the heart of so many repeating relationship patterns.You’ll learn how unmet emotional needs shape sche
131. No Matches, No Dates - Is Something Wrong With Me?
Send Gemma a messageIn today’s episode, I answer a short but powerful question that came in anonymously:“Hi Gemma, I cannot even get a match, let alone a date. What the hell is wrong with me?”If you’ve ever stared at a dating app wondering why nothing is happening and quietly concluded “it must be me”, this episode is for you.I'll look at three key areas:The reality of modern dating apps – wh
130. What Emotionally Available Partners Actually Do
Send Gemma a messageWe hear the term “emotionally unavailable” all the time, yet many women are not sure what the opposite actually looks like in real life. In this episode, Gemma breaks down emotional availability in clear, practical terms, so you can recognise it early, feel safer in your body and stop settling for relationships that leave you guessing.Gemma also explores how schemas like Emotio
129: The Real Dating Mindset: 10 Shifts That Protect You From Old Patterns
Send Gemma a messageDating can stir up every schema you have. If you have a history of emotionally unavailable partners, narcissistic relationships or spending years in situationships that never really went anywhere, getting back out there can feel both hopeful and terrifying.In this episode I walk you through ten grounded mindset shifts that help you stay in Healthy Adult mode while you date so y
128. The Sorry Reflex - Why You Apologise (When You Don’t Need To)
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode, Gemma unpacks The Sorry Reflex - the automatic urge to apologise, even when we’ve done nothing wrong. Rooted in the subjugation schema, this coping behaviour often begins in childhood, where expressing needs or disagreeing felt unsafe. When our nervous system equates disapproval with danger, “sorry” becomes a way to stay safe and connected.Gemma explains how th
127. Can they change? Two Essential Qualities That Make It Possible
Send Gemma a messageIf you are asking can this improve, this episode gives you a simple lens. Gemma unpacks two essential capacities that predict whether change is possible in a relationship. You will hear why the brain repeats what is familiar, how schemas drive loops and how to assess real readiness for growth in yourself and in someone you are dating.In this episodeWhy patterns repeat even when
126. Inside Limerence (Part 2): From fantasy to freedom
Send Gemma a messageWhat limerence really is, why it hooks into our deepest unmet needs and how to gently unhook using a schema-therapy lens.In Part 2, Gemma explores limerence as a preoccupying, often intoxicating state that’s fueled by unmet needs - with abandonment and emotional deprivation schemas usually at the core. She explains why the brain’s reward systems (hello, dopamine) and a quieted
125. Inside Limerence (Part 1): The psychology of the crush that won’t quit
Send Gemma a message🎁 Download Free Guide: Dating With Insight 🩷 Love Wisely Priority list for Feb '26💛 Access Elevate You Worth: Self-Worth Healing BundleIf you’ve ever been mentally and emotionally stuck on someone - checking for “signs,” fantasising a future and riding waves of hope and anxiety, then you may have experienced limerence. In Part 1, Gemma explains what limerence is (and isn
124. Narcissism Explained: What to Watch For in Relationships
Send Gemma a message A listener asks: “What exactly is narcissism and how can I tell if I’m dating someone with narcissistic traits?” In this episode, Gemma breaks narcissism down into plain English. You’ll learn why it’s best understood as a personality style on a spectrum, how narcissistic coping modes show up through self-absorption and poor tolerance for your subjectivity and the concrete sign
Inside Love Wisely: A Heart-Centred Journey to Rewrite Your Love Template
Send Gemma a messageEnrollments are Open, Doors Close Wednesday 17th 11:59PM (AEST)In this short bonus episode, I’m giving you a clear picture of what’s inside my 12-week group coaching program, Love Wisely, which begins Wednesday, September 24th.This program is for women who are ready to break free from old relationship patterns - especially the pull toward emotionally unavailable or narcissistic
123. The Fears That Hold You Back: 5 Limiting Beliefs Keeping You From Healthy Love
Send Gemma a messageGemma answers the most common questions she’s received about Love Wisely and widens the lens to address the deeper fears and limiting beliefs that stop women from changing their relationship patterns. You’ll learn how schemas (like abandonment, emotional deprivation, defectiveness/shame, subjugation, approval-seeking and unrelenting standards) quietly shape attraction, toleranc
122. The Catch-22 of Attraction: Why We Want Love but End Up with Distance
Send Gemma a messageWhen your heart wants closeness but your “old map” keeps pulling you toward distance, you’re stuck in the Catch-22 of attraction. In this episode, Gemma explains how early schemas quietly shape who you’re drawn to, why “chemistry” so often points you toward the familiar (not the healthy), and what it takes to consciously rewrite your Love Template so you can choose emotionally
121. When “Staying Friends” Costs Your Self-Respect: Trauma Bonds, Avoidant Partners & Letting Go
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode I answer a listener Q from “Maddie,” who’s in post-breakup limbo with an avoidant ex. I unpack blurred boundaries after a breakup, why “staying friends” can quietly erode self-respect, how trauma bonds differ from schema-triggered dynamics, and what it really takes to let go when your abandonment schema is pulling you back. You’ll also get a simple Relationship
120. The Rescuer Complex: Why Saving Them Won't Heal You
Send Gemma a messageWhy do caring, empathic women end up doing the heavy lifting in love, staying out of guilt and “rescuing” partners at the expense of their own needs? In this episode, Gemma unpacks the unconscious pull to fix others, how childhood patterns (self-sacrifice, subjugation, emotional deprivation) set the stage, and the real cost of over-functioning. You’ll learn how to shift from “f
119. Your Past Relationships Are Trying to Tell You Something… Are You Listening?
Send Gemma a message Every past relationship leaves clues. Patterns you’ve fallen into. The kinds of people you’re drawn to. The roles you find yourself playing without even realising it.In this episode of Healing for Love, I’m walking you through 6 powerful reflection questions to help you see your love life more clearly and prepare you to approach dating in a new way.These are the same questions
117. How She Stopped Choosing Emotionally Unavailable Men - A Real Case Journey
Send Gemma a messageMeet Sophie, a 37-year-old woman who spent years feeling stuck in painful relationship cycles. Like many women I work with, she kept attracting emotionally unavailable or narcissistic men — despite knowing, deep down, that something wasn’t right.In this episode, I’ll walk you through Sophie’s journey: from identifying her relational schemas (like abandonment, emotional deprivat
116: Why Do We Minimize Harm in Relationships? Understanding the Psychology Behind Tolerating Abuse
Send Gemma a messageIn this important solo episode, Gemma reflects on a disturbing real-life conversation overheard between two teenage girls — one of whom casually describes being physically assaulted by her boyfriend. What follows is a powerful deep dive into why girls and women downplay harmful, even abusive, behaviour in relationships.From shame, trauma bonding, and fear of judgement to deeply
115 – Healing for Love: Why Reparenting Your Abandoned Inner Child is the First Step to Secure Relationships
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode, Gemma explores one of the most foundational concepts when it comes to healing relationship patterns, the abandonment schema.Whether you're currently dating or in a long-term relationship, understanding your own abandonment schema and how it influences your emotions, choices, and reactions is essential for cultivating emotional safety and secure connection.
114. Are You Dating As Your True Self — Or a Coping Mode?
Send Gemma a messageSchema Coaching & Support – Work with Dr. Gemma Gladstone Support the show🩷 Join Love Wisely (Group) PRIORITY List - we start September!🎓 NEW - Love Wisely Foundations Course - Get Instant Access!✅Dating App Profile CHECK-UP🎁 Dating With Insight - FREE Guide💛 Elevate You Worth (50% off only for listeners) - Use coupon WORTHY Connect with Me 📩hello@drgemmagladstone.com 🌐 We
113. The Mailbox – Healing from the Mother Wound: Letting Go of the Hope That Keeps You Stuck
Send Gemma a messageIn this mailbox episode, we dive into a listener question from Amy (name changed for privacy), who is struggling with the trauma bond with her narcissistic and emotionally neglectful mother. Amy shares her experience of emotional neglect, manipulation, gaslighting, and rejection—all while navigating the complicated reality of trying to maintain boundaries. ✔ What a trauma bond
112. Breaking Free from People-Pleasing: Six Questions to Help You Reconnect with Yourself
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode, Dr Gemma takes a deep dive into one of the most common and persistent life patterns—people-pleasing. If you've ever found yourself constantly prioritizing others' needs over your own, struggling to say no, or feeling exhausted from always trying to keep the peace, this episode is for you.She explores:✅ What people-pleasing really is and why it’s not j
111. Seven Deadly Sins of the Narcissistic Dater: Red Flags You Can’t Ignore
Send Gemma a messageEpisode Description:Are you dating someone new and wondering if they’re truly a good match? Or do you have a pattern of attracting emotionally unavailable or narcissistic partners? In this episode, Gemma breaks down The 7 Deadly Sins of the Narcissistic Dater—key warning signs that indicate deeper personality issues and potential toxic relationship dynamics.These signs often re
108. Which Life Script Do You Want to Let Go of This Year?
Send Gemma a messageHappy New Year! In this first episode of 2025, Gemma invites you to reflect on the life scripts and recurring patterns that no longer serve you and take intentional steps toward rewriting them. Life scripts are the unconscious stories and patterns that shape how we think, feel, and behave, often holding us back from living authentically and joyfully.By unpacking and letting go
ENCORE + More: 73. Six Strategies for dealing with difficult relatives over the Holidays
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to the final Episode for this year! We will be back with new episodes in 2025. Support the show🩷 Join Love Wisely (Group) PRIORITY List - we start September!🎓 NEW - Love Wisely Foundations Course - Get Instant Access!✅Dating App Profile CHECK-UP🎁 Dating With Insight - FREE Guide💛 Elevate You Worth (50% off only for listeners) - Use coupon WORTHY Connect with Me 📩hell
107. The Guilt Game: Inside The Martyr Mode
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode of we dive deep into the "martyr mode," a coping style often discussed in schema therapy. We explore what it means to have a martyr complex or mode, how it shows up in relationships, and the emotional dynamics that fuel this behaviour.Key topics covered include:The defining traits of the martyr mode and how it may stem from deeper emotional wounds, unm
106. Healthy Adult Daily Practice: An Intentional Reflection Tool
Send Gemma a messageHealthy Adult Daily Practice: An Intentional Reflection ToolIn this episode, Gemma introduces a practical tool called Healthy Adult Daily Practice, designed to help you strengthen and nurture your Healthy Adult mode. Building on the foundational features of the Healthy Adult mode discussed in the previous episode, this episode walks you through a simple, intentional practice th
105. 7 Essential Characteristics of the Healthy Adult Mode
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode, Gemma dives into the cornerstone of schema therapy: the Healthy Adult mode. This is the part of us that represents balance, wisdom, and compassion—our best self that helps us navigate relationships, emotions, and life’s challenges effectively.What You’ll Learn:Mindfulness: Why mindfulness is the foundational building block for self-awareness, self-reflection, a
104: The Good, the Bad and the Bond: Understanding Trauma Bonding.
Send Gemma a messageIn this solo episode, Gemma dives deep into the concept of trauma bonding, shedding light on why some people feel emotionally tethered to unhealthy or toxic relationships. Drawing from listener questions she explores the psychological mechanisms behind trauma bonds, including the powerful dynamic of the "good-bad ratio" and how it can replicate patterns from childhood
103. A Deep Dive into the Self-Sacrifice Schema
Send Gemma a messageThis episode will resonate with anyone struggling with an overdeveloped sense of responsibility to others and those who feel “stuck” in cycles of overgiving. In this solo episode, Gemma dives deep into the self-sacrifice schema, exploring how it manifests, its origins in family dynamics, and the toll it takes on those who constantly prioritize others over themselves. This schem
ENCORE. Dating with an abandonment schema: Coping with triggers
Send Gemma a messageNew Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE! Spots are limited. Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailable
102. Dating Without Fear: 8 Common Anxieties and How to Overcome Them
Send Gemma a messageNew Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE! Spots are limited. Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailable
ENCORE: 41. Dating with an Abandonment Schema Part 1
Send Gemma a messageSpecial Announcements:New Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE!Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailab
ENCORE + more: Dating Fatigue - How To Stay Hopeful!
Send Gemma a messageSpecial Announcements:New Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE!Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailab
101. Is Hook-Up Culture Affecting Your Self-Worth?
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode, we explore the challenges of navigating casual sex culture and hookup culture, particularly for individuals with abandonment schemas, emotional deprivation schemas, or anxious attachment styles. Join us as we discuss common scenarios, the emotional impacts of casual encounters, and strategies for those seeking meaningful relationships.Key Discussion Points:The
100. The Mailbox: Hidden in Plain Sight: Recognizing Red Flags You Can’t Ignore
Send Gemma a messageNew Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE!In this thoughtful Mailbox episode, Justine and Gemma respond to a listener’s heartfelt question about navigating the confusion between green flag
99. The Mailbox - The Hidden Costs of Casual Sex: Unpacking the Abandonment Schema
Send Gemma a messageSpecial Announcements:New Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE!Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailab
98. The Entitlement Trap: Understanding the Schema That Sabotages Relationships
Send Gemma a messageIn this episode, we unpack the complexities of the entitlement schema—a schema that's often linked to narcissistic traits and one that rarely brings individuals to therapy. Unlike schemas like abandonment or self-sacrifice, those with an entitlement schema often believe their way of thinking is justified, which makes it hard to seek change. We explore how this schema is fo
97. This Hidden Schema Sabotages Success: Unmasking the Failure Schema
Send Gemma a messageEpisode Summary:Dr Gemma Gladstone and Justine Corry dive into the Failure Schema, a schema that is often overlooked but can be profoundly impactful in many areas of life, particularly in achievement and work-related contexts. They explore how this schema manifests, its origins, and how it often intertwines with other schemas such as defectiveness, dependence, and even unrelent
96. Break-up Recovery: Can we really ever get 'Closure'?
Send Gemma a messageSpecial Announcements:New Group Coaching Program: "Date Differently": A 6-week online group coaching program designed to help women build self-trust, set boundaries, and date with confidence. Starts November 6th. SIGN UP BEFORE 26TH OCT AND SAVE!Signature Course – The Red Flag Project: This newly updated course covers schemas, red flags, and how to recognize unavailab
95. A Schema Therapy Take on Defensiveness & How to Reduce it.
Send Gemma a messageSchema Circle Membership - Join Now! Information about private therapy/coaching with Gemma or Justine email us: justineandgemma@goodmood.com.au In today's episode, Gemma explores the impact of Defensiveness on relationships, its root causes, and practical steps to overcome it.Key Points:Defensive Phrases:Common examples: "It's not my fault," "You always
94. Self-Reparenting: Practical Tips
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Schema Circle Membership - Join Now! Reparenting is at the heart of schema therapy and you can learn how to do it yourself. In this episode Gemma and Justine discuss how to start reparenting yourself and provide several practical suggestions for how to get started. Reparenting is central to psychological and schema hea
93. Why am I surrounded by Narcissists?
Send Gemma a messageGet the Free Guide on Breaking the toxic ties of Narcissistic parentsWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Schema Circle Membership - Join Now! In this episode Gemma discusses what puts people at risk of having narcissistic friends. What are some of the schemas that play a role in this? What can you do if you realise that you have 1 too many self-absorbed
92. Back to Basics: What is a Schema?
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Schema Circle Membership - Join Now! In this episode Gemma and Justine go back to basics and take a deep-dive into what is a schema or an Early Maladaptive Schema to be precise. This episode will provide you with the basics of what you need to know if you're wanting to understand schemas more thoroughly or are p
91. Understanding the Mistrust/Abuse Schema
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Today we share a clip from our "Schema In Focus" series in our Schema Circle Membership. Gemma and Justine discuss this schema in-depth, including its origins, what it feels like, how it is typically triggered and other things to look out for with this schema. Support the show🩷 Join Love Wisely (Group) PRIOR
90. Invisible Barriers: Why Women Stay with Unavailable Partners
Send Gemma a messageIn today's episode Gemma discusses the invisible reasons why so many women find it hard to leave an unhealthy relationship EARLY. Based on her experience and knowledge gained from hearing the stories of hundred's of women, Gemma outlines her top 3 schema-related reasons why women don't exit relationships with partners who shows signs of unavailability, control
89. Understanding the abandonment wound and where it comes from
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In today's episode we play an excerpt from a deep dive discussion on the abandonment schema from our monthly membership program, The Schema Circle.We discuss the abandonment schema and fine tune it's origins, what it actually feels like and the many triggers for this schema. Support the show🩷 Join Love Wisely
87. BITESIZE QUESTION. Are you an Over-Compensator?
Send Gemma a messageWhen a schema is triggered, we typically have an urge to respond in 1 of 3 (unhelpful) ways. In this episode Gemma talks about 'over-compensation' as one of those coping style. Over-compensation (also referred to a counter-attack) is one of 3 maladaptive coping styles discussed in schema therapy. Gemma reviews examples of over-compensation behaviours associated wit
BONUS: Compassionate Responding Meditation for Therapists & Other Carers
Send Gemma a messageDear Therapist, Carer or anyone witnessing the emotional pain & suffering of a client or another person or friend. You are invited to take a breath, stop and notice how you are feeling. Spend 20 minutes doing this compassion-based exercise with Dr Gemma Gladstone as she guides you through a journey of loving-kindness towards both yourself and the person you are choosing t
85: The Abandonment Schema: Relationships & Break-ups
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In this episode, Gemma and Justine answer a question from one of their Schema Circle members.The question asks how can we know if our reaction to a break-up is fuelled by an abandonment schema or not? Before getting into this question, Gemma provides a review of the abandonment schema, it's origin and how it tends
84. Three Long-Term Consequences of Narcissistic Parenting
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast! Support the show🩷 Join Love Wisely (Group) PRIORITY List - we start September!🎓 NEW - Love Wisely Foundations Course - Get Instant Access!✅Dating App Profile CHECK-UP🎁 Dating With Insight - FREE Guide💛 Elevate You Worth (50% off only for listeners) - Use coupon WORTHY Connect with Me 📩hello@drgemmagladstone.com 🌐 Webs
83. BITESIZE QUESTION: How can I start to heal my emotional deprivation schema?
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In this episode, we discuss the emotional deprivation schema and how to start to heal this schema from the inside out.This is probably the most common schema - about 50% of people have this schema. It's the one that can be the hardest to recognise because we are often not aware of what we didn't get.Stay tune
82. BITESIZE QUESTION: What's the difference between self-sacrifice and subjugation schemas?
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Are you unsure about the difference between these 2 common schemas.In this bitesize episode we discuss the difference and similarities between these schemas. These schemas are often considered to be 'conditional' schemas in that they develop as a way to cope with and respond to the core schemas - like abandon
81. The Mailbox: What is a disorganized attachment style and why we prefer schemas!?
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In this thought-provoking episode, we explore the concept of disorganized attachment style and challenge the inclination to worry excessively about labels.Join us as we delve into the complexities of disorganized attachment and shed light on why understanding it shouldn't be a source of distress.We'll discuss
80. Talking to a Narcissist? Avoid These 6 Common Pitfalls
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Talking to a Narcissist? Avoid These 6 Common PitfallsVery often, if you were raised by a narcissist, in adulthood you will more or less fall into the trap of seeking the approval of people who are narcissistic.A narcissists acceptance of you is often conditional – as long as you are the version of you they want to see,
79. From Sizzle to Fizzle: When a Great First Date Doesn't Lead Anywhere
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Don't you hate this! You'v e had a first great date with someone and then it's all down hill from there. What went wrong? In this episode Justine and Gemma put this issue under the microscope and dissect the anatomy of this all too common and disappointing scenario. Support the show🩷 Join Love Wisely (
78. Don't Second Guess: Trusting Your Intuition to Identify Early Indicators of Intimate Partner Abuse
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!TRIGGER WARNING - Intimate partner abuse discussed and some sobering statistics of violence/sexual violence against woman are stated.In today's episode we speak with Psychologist Leanne Nunn who has recently completed her PhD research on The Earliest Warning Signs of Intimate Partner Abuse. Leanne has over twen
77. The Heart of the Matter: Understanding Our Core Emotional Needs
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In this episode we discuss core emotional needs and why they are so important for humans throughout our life. We are born into the world with needs and our emotional, social, physical and psychological well-being depends upon them. Our early care-givers are responsible for meeting our needs and as we grow and develop
76. Emotional Landmines: Understanding and Coping with Schema Triggers
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In this episode, Gemma does a solo show talking all about schema triggers and schema activation.Gemma described the trigger chain and how we can break down the components of schema activation - feelings, thoughts, memories, sensations. She describes what action urges are and how they are also part of the schema. She t
75: The Lasting Impact of a Close Friend's Death
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!TRIGGER WARNING - This episode talks about death, dying, grief and breast cancer.In Loving Memory of Astrid von Lojewski-Wilson 16/11/76 - 11/12/19, a beautiful human being, greatly missed every day. In this podcast, Gemma talks about the profound impact of losing a close friend through death. She describes her own ex
74: Understanding Narcissistic Modes in Schema Therapy
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In schema therapy, 'Modes' are a key part of the model. Schema Modes have been defined as moment-to-moment emotional states and coping responses that we all experience. But also, Modes can be understood as 'parts' of self. So modes can be observable to others and/or also a way to conceptualise th
73: Six strategies for dealing with difficult relatives over the holidays
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In this episode Gemma and Justine discuss 6 strategies for dealing with difficult family relatives over the Christmas and holiday period. Getting together with family for many, can be a stressful and challenging time. There are usually lots of unspoken expectations and sometimes old resentments and old hurts which get
72: Four things you can work on if you think you are Narcissistic
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In this episode Justine & Gemma discuss 4 things you can start working on if you think that you might have narcissistic traits or modes.Typically, if someone tells us they think they are narcissistic, they often are not at all. Most clients who are narcissistic don't present for therapy unless their world is s
71: Understanding Your Emotions With Mindfulness & Without Judgement
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!Dr Gemma Gladstone discusses mindfulness to emotions in this extended podcast lesson. Gemma describes what emotions are and the difference between the 5 basic emotions (anger, fear, sadness, disgust and joy) and more complex emotions such as shame. She discusses why it is so important to acknowledge and experience emo
70. The Mailbox: My Partner Had An Affair, What Now?
Send Gemma a messageWelcome to another episode of The Good Mood Clinic Podcast!In this episode we discuss a question from a listener in our mailbox series. We love getting your emails and questions! The Mailbox: My Partner Had An Affair, What Now?When you find out your partner (who you thought was wonderful) has been unfaithful, this is pretty devastating news to say the least. It's confusi
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